“You’re killing my MoJo. Scoot over a little.”
He just grinned, then moved to stand behind me to read the screen as I typed. I ignored him, as only old married couples can.
Chatting with the Queen of England. Washing the cat. Painting my nails. Saving the world. Strangling my husband. “WRITING!”
He grins, “I thought you liked writing?”
“I do, I do. I like writing. I like chocolate chip cookies. And I also like peace and quiet while I’m writing. Here’s your cookie, sweetie, 2 outa 3 ‘aint bad.”
In honor of my husband’s incessant ability to kill my concentration just for fun, I’ve decided to list my top ten ways to prove you’re a freelance writer.
Top 10 Ways to Know You’re a Freelance Writer
- You’ve gotten in the shower and found you only shaved one leg the day before. So you say what the heck and start an alternating limb shaving schedule to save time- time management at its best. And since Blogger Dad swears he doesn’t shave his legs (not that I believe him for a second), for the guys, Dave adds, “You haven’t shaved or seen your family in so long that they accidentally reported a Sasquatch siting when you came out of your office yesterday.”
- Eyeing that baby sling, you begin to wonder if you could craft a double harness that will hold your child and your laptop.
- Your desk looks like you live there, because you do. “Could you pass me that extra pair of socks on top of the monitor? Thanks.”
- You eat more meals with your computer than with live people.
- You realize you put your underwear on backward- 12 hours ago.
- Your fingers move across an invisible keyboard in your sleep.
- You find crumbs in your bra (or your bellybutton, Dave) and consider eating them because, hey, it’s quicker than making a trip to the kitchen.
- Your children have the best vocabulary in the neighborhood and can diagram sentences by age 5.
- A shopping spree at Staples excites you more than the prospect of sex.
- Instead of instituting casual day at the office, you have a work naked day. The neighbors love it.
I will admit to 8 out of 10, but I’m not saying which ones are true. 😉 Go hug your kids, tie them up with duct tape, and GET BACK TO WORK! 😀