Reality

Kat felt weak in her knees, but she stood strong. Because that was what she’d always done. Stood strong.
“So who are you really, Father Johnny?”
“The real question, Kat, is who are you? If you can understand yourself, then you’ll know where my journey started. Do you believe in God?”
“We already-”
“So then, I was once who you are today, ” he said. “If you want to understand me, you have to understand yourself. Why don’t you believe?”
“For starters? Because everyone runs around killing in God’s name.”
“But that’s a child’s answer and you’re already sixteen. You don’t know much about religion, do you?”
“Should I?”
“Do you know the difference between Christianity and Islam?”
“Why are we talking about this? You’re trying to get me to convert? There’s a reason why religion is not allowed in the schools. Because it brings out the kooks!”
“Please, humor me. The difference between Christianity and Islam?”
“How should I know? One prays in a mosque, one prays in a cathedral.”
“So you know nothing. To you God is simply an extension of foolish religion. And if religion had much to do with God, I might agree with you. If you want to accept my help, the first thing you’ll need to do is set any notion you have of religion aside. Put everything you think you know about Islam, Judaism, Christianity, Buddhism, all of it behind you. If you can do that, I may be able to help you.”
“What are you trying to do? Convert me?”
“You’ve demonstrated that you have no true moral compass. No fundamental beliefs that guide what is right or wrong in this world. How can you hope to recognize good and evil for what they truly are if you have no belief in a moral authority greater than yourself?”~ from Sinner, by Ted Dekker

Well, if you’re still reading, that means the mention of God doesn’t scare you. Congratulations!

So why the heck is there a quote from a Christian suspense writer on a business blog? Because it is a perfect example of the reality of perception.

Forming Your Reality

Each of us has a unique reality that we live in everyday. That reality is formed from our thoughts, beliefs, experiences.

When you were a child, you most likely spent hours imagining you were a princess, a horse wrangler, a pirate, a knight in King Arthur’s court, or a garbage man. (I was the knight, my brother was the garbage man.)

Most people think that as we age, we cease to create those pretend worlds. We don’t. We simply convert that imagination into a belief system, hobbies (like gaming), or communication skills. Some of us read obsessively as an outlet for that imagination, some of us write obsessively- but the imaginary world continues.

What’s the Point?

It’s important to remember that not everyone has the same reality as you. Some, like Kat, are completely reactive to situations in their life. Their thoughts and beliefs are handed down from generation to generation, or rubbed off from peers, authority figures, and the media. Not everyone actively pursues a belief system.

This disparity can drastically affect your business. Assumptions about your client’s or co-worker’s way of life and knowledge base can turn a relationship sour, fast. (especially on the Internet)

Never assume that someone else knows where you are coming from or understands an implied message. Cultures are different, values differ, and beliefs vary. Be up front, be crystal clear, and always be honest. Good communication always begins with honesty.

We’ll be discussing communication this week at Blue Duck. Stay tuned, we’ve got some good stuff planned for this week!

10 Responses to Reality
  1. Writer Dad
    December 1, 2008 | 9:05 pm

    Communication is only like one of my favorite things ever. I’m tuned.

    Writer Dad´s last spectacular blog post..Writer Dad in Rough Draft

  2. Writer Dad
    December 1, 2008 | 4:05 pm

    Communication is only like one of my favorite things ever. I’m tuned.

    Writer Dad´s last spectacular blog post..Writer Dad in Rough Draft

  3. Matthew Dryden
    December 2, 2008 | 1:29 am

    Like you said, she got this way because someone flipped her fiction first. Kat’s system is learned.

    Mention of God doesn’t scare me…not in the least. I’m always open to new ideas and new ways of thinking – but I was raised Baptist. Haven’t been out there for awhile.

    Matthew Dryden´s last spectacular blog post..You Hate Me (Because I Failed)

  4. Matthew Dryden
    December 1, 2008 | 8:29 pm

    Like you said, she got this way because someone flipped her fiction first. Kat’s system is learned.

    Mention of God doesn’t scare me…not in the least. I’m always open to new ideas and new ways of thinking – but I was raised Baptist. Haven’t been out there for awhile.

    Matthew Dryden´s last spectacular blog post..You Hate Me (Because I Failed)

  5. Lance
    December 2, 2008 | 2:02 am

    Hey Jamie, some of us still pretend we’re a garbage man….I do – it’s a crazy game I created years ago – and the kids can never get enough. In fact, I got to be the “garbage man” just last week! It was a lot easier when the “trash” was only five years old…not that some of it is approaching fourteen, it’s much harder!! But…I don’t think that’s where this story was going today…

    Communication…it always seems like the biggest problem in any organization. Or family. Or friendships. Looking forward to this Jamie…but no more talk of garbage men – I’m getting the urge to chase my kids around – and it’s soon their bedtime…

    Lance´s last spectacular blog post..Sunday Thought For The Day

  6. Lance
    December 1, 2008 | 9:02 pm

    Hey Jamie, some of us still pretend we’re a garbage man….I do – it’s a crazy game I created years ago – and the kids can never get enough. In fact, I got to be the “garbage man” just last week! It was a lot easier when the “trash” was only five years old…not that some of it is approaching fourteen, it’s much harder!! But…I don’t think that’s where this story was going today…

    Communication…it always seems like the biggest problem in any organization. Or family. Or friendships. Looking forward to this Jamie…but no more talk of garbage men – I’m getting the urge to chase my kids around – and it’s soon their bedtime…

    Lance´s last spectacular blog post..Sunday Thought For The Day

  7. Jamie
    December 1, 2008 | 11:44 pm

    Hey Writer Dad,

    I’m not sure someone as skilled as you will learn much, but I’ll give it a try. 🙂

    Matthew,

    It’s sad how many people just chew and swallow without thinking. I went to a Baptist church for years. Then I actually read my Bible and realized something was off-kilter. Never been the same since. :0)

    Religion bites. (Bet you’d never find a Baptist, or Presbyterian, or Buddhist, or *insert religion of choice* who would say that, huh?)

    Hey Lance-Man!

    We play the garbage game, too! My boys love it, but they’re getting heavy when they squirm and I’m getting soft since I no longer spend my days lifting patients. 🙁

    Life is about relationships and communication plays a big part. Glad you are looking forward to it, it’s scaring me a little. 🙂

  8. Writer Dad
    December 2, 2008 | 2:39 pm

    That’s a nice thing to say Jamie, and you’ve already taught me a lot.

    Writer Dad´s last spectacular blog post..Writer Dad in Rough Draft

  9. Writer Dad
    December 2, 2008 | 9:39 am

    That’s a nice thing to say Jamie, and you’ve already taught me a lot.

    Writer Dad´s last spectacular blog post..Writer Dad in Rough Draft

  10. Jamie
    January 6, 2010 | 8:15 pm

    Hey Writer Dad,

    I'm not sure someone as skilled as you will learn much, but I'll give it a try. 🙂

    Matthew,

    It's sad how many people just chew and swallow without thinking. I went to a Baptist church for years. Then I actually read my Bible and realized something was off-kilter. Never been the same since. :0)

    Religion bites. (Bet you'd never find a Baptist, or Presbyterian, or Buddhist, or *insert religion of choice* who would say that, huh?)

    Hey Lance-Man!

    We play the garbage game, too! My boys love it, but they're getting heavy when they squirm and I'm getting soft since I no longer spend my days lifting patients. 🙁

    Life is about relationships and communication plays a big part. Glad you are looking forward to it, it's scaring me a little. 🙂

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